Because Time has a Loophole
by Life-Is-For-Finding-Answers xx
Summary: Awake in 2008, Alex just can't adjust to life. Irritable and bordering on depression, she looks up her eighties friends. There's one person she can't find but when she does, could it have all been a dream after all? AU series 3. Implied Galex.
1. Chapter One

**Authors Note:** _Yep, yep, I know...starting another Fanfic when I haven't finished my other one! But for those of you reading _History Repeating Itself_, don't worry, updates should be coming soon, but I seem to be finding it hard to write it at the moment! :D Anyway, this story is set after 2:8 and is another one of those 'if she'd gone home' but I hope it's going to be a little different (and not too LOM!)._

**Disclaimer: **_As usual, I own nothing recognisable as Ashes to Ashes and like many people, if the BBC or Kudos or whoever wishes to give the rights away, I'd be very grateful! :D _

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><p><em><strong>Because Time has a Loophole<br>Chapter One-Reunited but with a Guilty Conscience**_

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><p>"Alex?" The nurse called, "Evan is here to pick you up."<p>

She looked up from her notes and nodded at the nurse. "Okay, I'll along in a few minutes."

The nurse smiled and left her to it.

DI Alexandra Drake had been awake from her coma for about six months and spent the first two of those in hospital before being transferred to a rehabilitation centre for the last four months. Today Evan was here to take her home for once and for all. Once she had regained her ability to speak, the doctors and nurses were surprised that her vocabulary consisted of words that didn't fit her psychological personality profile. When they asked Evan to talk to her, she had described it with a smile as 'Gene Hunt syndrome'.

When she had learnt to walk and move, she had often let a puzzling question slip. "How bad was the internal bleeding?" To begin with, the doctors had passed it off as a misspoken question, but as Alex persisted for an answer, she began to realise why everybody else was so confused.

She'd been shot in stomach in the 1980s world.

_World ._It was funny how she now thought of it as a different world rather than a dystopia that was keeping her from her daughter.

Alex pondered for a moment about them. Dear Shaz, how promising her career was and definitely the bright spark in CID. She and Alex had shared many laughs together and Shaz almost felt like the sister Alex never had.

The Chris, the div. Of course he wasn't as stupid as Ray made him out to be. He did usually have something valuable...sort of valuable, to add to cases. Then she remembered when he helped he give the presentation back when they were solving the Neary gun dealings.

Ray...what could she say about him? His misogynistic attitudes would have him locked up today probably. But in truth, he was a good copper who showed compassion where needed and was fiercely loyal to Gene Hunt.

Gene Hunt.

The Manc Lion. The Guv. The ruler of Fenchurch East.

Alex's breath caught in her throat. There were so many things she could call him to insult his ego, but deep down there was only one word that truly said it all.

Constant.

He was her constant. Always saving her from the outcomes for reckless decisions and from 'the local nutters', he was the one thing that made her think twice about leaving.

Although the memories of that world were fading with every passing day, she had made Evan search through the internet to find a white leather jacket. He had been quite puzzled at her sudden interest, but had given in when he heard the psychological report given out by the rehabilitation centre.

Alex had also been keeping a record of the 80s; writing everything down that she could remember and drawing funny diagrams to remind her about amusing little talks she had with Gene or the way that they confused Chris and Ray with Operation Rose just before Jackie Queen had arrived.

Checking her watch, Alex threw on her white leather jacket and picked up her notebook. It was time to go home.

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><p>About a month into her rehabilitation, she had been sent to a psychologist and psychiatrist to evaluate her mental state. They had asked what she had experienced in her coma. Talking about it wasn't a problem, but they believed that she had simply emerged herself in Sam Tyler's fantasy, that was when she'd started to get issues.<p>

Her psychological personality profile said she wasn't a naturally violent person, so when she took a swing at the psychologist for saying Gene Hunt wasn't real; it shocked most of the staff, including Evan who made sure it wasn't ever mentioned again.

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><p>Sighing with regret, Alex realised just how much the 80s had changed her. She was sat in complete silence with Evan in front seat of the car, making sure not to take her eyes off it as they passed.<p>

Fenchurch East CID.

Obviously, she hadn't been allowed to return to work and in turn, hadn't seen the building for almost seven months. It was mostly the same as the 80s, but it was slightly brighter and had more cars parked on the street outside.

Evan, sensing Alex's excitement, drew up alongside the front door. Alex smiled and then frowned.

"You can't park here. Gene'll kill you for nicking his spot." Darting her eyes backwards a forwards looking for Viv, she realised that this was 2008 and Gene Hunt was most definitely _not _here.

"Alex, we need to talk about this before you see Molly again." Alex knotted her fingers on her lap. "Gene Hunt, Ray Carling, Chris Skelton and Shaz Granger were figments. A messed up dream. They weren't real."

"But it _felt_ so real!" Alex said firmly, not taking her eyes of the dashboard. "You weren't there...you wouldn't know. Actually, scratch that; you _were_ there. You helped me get some of the suspects' legal representation from Caroline."

"Alex..." Evan replied gently, but then stopped. He thought back to 1981 and 1982. These had been the years Alex claimed to have lived in while she had been lying in a coma for a little over three days.

He couldn't remember much about those years, other than Tim and Caroline price had been killed in a bomb explosion and DCI Hunt had destroyed the tape so Alex wouldn't know.

DCI Hunt. Gene Hunt.

Evan frowned slightly and let his jaw gape. He closed his eyes and tried very hard to remember anything else. There was a woman in the office too. She had talked to Hunt in a familiar fashion and was obviously quite highly ranked. Evan remembered that this had surprised him at the time.

But what was her name?

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><p>When they got through the front door, Alex could immediately smell flapjacks and chocolate brownies cooking. She looked around the hall and living room in awe; well, all she'd seen for the past four months were the same dull rooms.<p>

Suddenly a young girl about twelve emerged from the kitchen with a wooden spoon in her left hand and chocolate on her face. Dropping her notebook on the coffee table, Alex ran over to see her.

"Molly!" She exclaimed, absolutely ecstatic at being finally reunited with her daughter.

"Mum, I've missed you so much!" The hospital had let Molly visit once a week for the last three months as it seemed to be helping Alex's recovery.

"Is that chocolate on your nose?"

Evan smiled at the two and left them in peace to chat and giggle while he went to finish some case reports upstairs.

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><p>Alex watched as her daughter set about keeping an eye on both the brownies and flapjacks simultaneously. She admired the way she flicked from one thing to another and never left anything unfinished. Watching her move about, Alex thought about how hard she had fought to get home.<p>

She had thought Gene was corrupt. She had covered up a killing. Gene thought she was corrupt. Jeanette had held her at gunpoint.

Then she had fallen.

Gene had shot her. Gene had shot her! What had he been thinking? He never missed a target! When she saw him again, she was going to remind him what damage her left hook could do!

When she saw him again...

Then the reality came crashing down.

It wasn't real. It was a dream. She was never going to see him again. But...but...that wasn't possible! Alex had to clear his name! He couldn't be left with his reputation ruined. Yet she was sat here watching her daughter with without a care in the world. The feeling in her stomach started to come back.

It was guilt.

She was living while he could be anywhere, in any state or in any kind of troub-

_It was a dream_ a little voice reminded her.

But Alex didn't care. There was a part of her missing and it wasn't going to be found in this timeline.

Then she realised. She'd fallen in both senses of the word.

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><p>Evan was flickering restlessly through the old files while still thinking about that fateful day back in 1981.<p>

Then he remembered her name.

DI Alexandra Drake.

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><p><strong>Authors Note:<strong> _Hehe, what a cliff-hanger! There probably won't be many quick updates with this story...you have been warned! Reviews would be great, even if it's so say I should carry one (or not, depending on what you thought) thankyou! :D_

Finding Answers xx


	2. Chapter Two

**Authors Note: **_Great apologies for such a slow update, what with homework my muse was being squashed! Although, as a random bit of useless information, my performing arts group is doing a short piece of drama and the idea is set around somebody who is living in a coma world! Of, course I didn't tell them that when I pitched the idea...I'm not obsessed or anything... :D_

_Oh, and this is un-beta-ed as usual :) just one last thing (i promise) I changed Gene's age to fit with something that will happen later on so he wasn't 19 in '53, but yeah, it should work out :)_

**Disclaimer: **_As usual, I don't own anything the looks familiar from Ashes apart from Lexi Williams (I hope nobody has used her before!)_

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><p><em><strong>Because Time has a Loophole<br>Chapter Two-Irritability and a Daughter**_

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><p>"'Bye, Molls, Evan'll be there at three to pick you up and then we can go shopping!" Alex called to her daughter as she heard the front door click open.<p>

"Okay, mum, love you!" Molly called back, letting the door slam as she went.

Alex had been home for around two weeks and was getting increasing bored of the dreary everyday tasks. On the second day back from the Hospital, she had ransacked her wardrobe for something casual to wear, but hadn't realised before how dismal it all seemed to be.

She missed her eighties clothes; the bright colour made her stand out and feel alive. However after weeks of living back in the real world, she was starting to think that maybe it really was all a dream.

Alex knew how Sam had felt when he had come back. She could still hear them sometimes calling out to her. Shaz, worried about the responsibility of a DC. Chris who was worried about Shaz and Ray, who didn't appear to be around.

Then Gene.

She heard his voice the loudest, calling out to her to wake up. Unfortunately, all the messages came from her dreams and gave no indication of being real. She sighed and went to review Sam Tylers' psychological profile. So must have read it at least six times now, and was no closer to discovering what it was that seemed to bind her there.

Alex had actually been most worried about Evan. Since she had been home, he had seemed slightly cautious, almost _wary_ of her. She made a mental note to ask him when he came downstairs.

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><p>Alex picked up the post, searched through it briefly, and returned to the kitchen table where her and Evan were having breakfast. The first few days-no scratch that-even now, it made her feel funny that she sat down to eat breakfast. Back in Gene's World, she rarely had time for breakfast or had to eat it walking to work.<p>

"Evan, we need to talk." Alex studied his face carefully and measured his reaction.

He sighed and nodded. "Yeah, I think we do."

Alex sat perfectly and thought about where to begin.

"I'm going to tell you everything I know, and in return, tell me your side of the events and the reasons behind them." Evan gave her a slightly puzzled look. Alex nervously circled the rim of her mug with her index finger.

"I...um,er..." She trailed off, uncertain on how to start. It made her angry especially since she had practised and everything. Determined, she started again.

"I know how my parents died." She watched Evan face turn from curiosity to shock and finally to disappointment. "I also know why." Again, Evan faced changed, this time to a look of pure self-hatred.

"Then there's nothing else I can tell you. You were a little girl Alex! I couldn't let you grow up knowing what your father had tried and partially succeeded to do. It was a miracle that DCI Hunt was on my side in trying to get legal Guardianship of you."

"But it was the reason I was shot." Alex whispered, barely able to contain the sadness that was seeping into her body. "Layton had been blackmailing you and –. " She stopped and looked hard at Evan. "Did you say DCI Hunt?"

Evan shifted nervously in his seat. "Did you?" Alex repeated with a steely glare. She could feel herself moving threateningly close to Evan.

"Look, it was a slip of the tongue. Can you really blame me? It's all you've been going about for almost eight months." Evan tried to give her a consoling smile, but let it fade after she saw her stand up.

"I knew it! I was right! All those months of fighting to get home! I knew it." She waved one fist at the sky in internal rage. Evan knew. Evan _knew_!

"Alex, calm down. Think of what the doctors said about stress." _Stress!_ Alex thought. _What does Evan know about stress! I've been dying to go back to work!_

Alex paced around the room for a few minutes, piecing everything together. If Evan could remember he being there then...no, surely not? Surely it couldn't have been a _real_ place?

"Evan, do you remember a Ray Carling? Chris Skelton? Sharon Granger?"

"Alex, it was a very long time ago. I only remember Hunt because he helped me get custody of you. I'm sorry." Evan felt bad for lying to her but he knew what she was like. Alex would be up and about gathering information and leads, travelling miles all over the country. He couldn't risk anything happening to her. For Molly's sake.

Bored and quite disappointed, Alex went to look through the post again. Rolling her eyes at many cards and a few letters, she stopped at a familiar symbol.

Fenchurch East.

She could barely contain her excitement as she opened it, but in her heart, she knew what it was for.

"Evan, they're letting go back to work!" She smiled at him earnestly but when she noticed his expression, her face drooped. "It's only desk duty."

Evan nodded reluctantly and checked his watch. "Well, I'd better get going. Well done, Alex and I'll see you later." With that he was out the door.

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><p>Half an hour later with her mobile phone and credit card in her pocket, Alex Drake set out to walk to Fenchurch. She had spent to best part of eight months away from the 2008 version and felt she be reacquainted with the people and her work.<p>

The lack of surprise on many people's faces told her that the news hadn't been a secret. She felt funny seeing so many women around, especially as their badges all had quite high ranks. She made a special effort to try and remember not to ask anybody for a cup of tea and biscuits!

She was stopped just outside CID by a young girl who seemed quite taken aback that she was here.

"Who are you?" She asked pointedly. Alex fought off the urge to use the phrase _'Alex Drake, the only female DI in the Met' _because, if the girls badge was to be believed, that wasn't the case. Instead, Alex held out her hand.

"I'm DI Alexandra Drake, here to see my DCI about returning to work to work today." She smiled at the girl and pushed her way through the double doors.

The room fell silent.

Computers seemed to freeze, printers ceased copying and all eyes were upon Alex Drake. She smiled and waited for gene to give an instruction. She gasped abruptly, walked speedily to her desk as the tension heightened.

Gene wasn't there.

It was like a feeling of a ghostly presence, like somebody had died rather than never existed in this timeline.

However, one thing didn't seem to change. Within a minute, a gruff voice yelled from his office, "Drake, get in here."

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><p>So, after a formal interview and causal discussion, Alex's' DCI had given her the terms in which was allowed back in CID. Basically it was just on desk duty. Alex thought of Shaz and knew that her patience would be tested. However, it was that or going home.<p>

She chose desk duty.

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><p>And that is how, about three-and-a-half hours after her entrance into CID, Alex found herself tapping a pen on the desk in boredom.<p>

The rest of CID had gone on off on a case, leaving her with around a month worth of paperwork, suspect filing and lightweight organisation.

Sighing deeply, Alex ran her fingers across her face and rested he head on the table. She was sure that the paperwork hadn't been this tedious before she was in a coma. Then it occurred to her how Sam had felt before he jumped off the GMP building.

The world had turned a shade towards grey and the once coloured lights in her life were fading fast. She couldn't guarantee that committing suicide would bring her back. But, she couldn't leave Molly again.

Alex Drake was frustrated with everything. Nothing made sense anymore. The time-space continuum was even more messed up than Doctor Who!

After what felt like weeks, she finally flipped. Slamming the pen on the desk and throwing the paperwork on the floor, she stormed out leaving a trail of despair in her wake.

She made a quick right near the end of the corridor and dived in the toilets. Wiping a tear away, she locked a cubical and lent against the partition.

Why couldn't her life have been simple?

Most people grow up with at least one parent. They go to school, get a job and meet somebody they really like. Yeah, so three out of those four points applied to her. But then it changes. The guy you thought was Mr Amazing turns out to be a complete and utter bastard and then leaves you with a six month old baby. Then, about eleven years later, you get shot in the head by a strange man who is blackmailing your godfather. This bullet sends you back to 1981 where you learn a horrifying truth.

Oh, and don't forget about the part where you meet somebody who stole your heart. Except, you can't stay with him because you need to get back. Oh, and who would also technically be about twenty-five years older than you.

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><p>Alex had no idea the amount of time she had been there, slumped in a pile on the floor, but when she heard a gentle knocking sound and a soft voice, she knew her time hiding was up.<p>

"Ma'am?" The girl enquired. "What's wrong? CID have been very worried." She held out a hand yo steady Alex and led her over to some benches in the corner.

"I don't really know where to start." Alex admitted truthfully. "What's your name?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry. My name is DC Lexi Williams. I was drafted into CID about three months ago." Alex nodded, that's why she didn't recognise her. "So, go on, wrong's wrong?" Lexi probed.

"I, well...I guess you know I was shot, yeah?"

"Yeah," replied Lexi, "just start at the beginning."

"When I was eight years old, my parents were killed in a car explosion. Evan worked hard to be granted my legal Guardian and for the last twenty-seven years, he has practically been my father. On the 20th July 2008, I was called out to a negotiation with a gunman. He asked for me by name. Less than forty minutes after the negotiation was finished, I was being held hostage on a disused boat called the Princess Di. My captor was a man called Arthur Layton. He kept singing the lyrics to David Bowies' Ashes to Ashes."

Lexi nodded slowly, completely engrossed in Alex's tale. "Carry on." She instructed. He brown hair caught in the light and for a moment, she looked familiar to Alex.

"He shot me straight in the head." Lexi widened her eyes. "To cut a long story short, I had arrived in what I refer to as a 'coma world'. I could hear voices from the 'real world'. I was alive...and back in the eighties, just months before my parents were killed in the car bomb."

Lexi smiled in a pure amazement and opened her mouth to speak. "Were their others there? What was it like? How did you get back?"

Alex held up a hand to silence her and carried on.

"It was amazing. I met five truly amazing people. WPC Sharon Granger, almost Skelton, DC Chris Skelton, DS Ray Carling and DCI Gene Hunt. Shaz was so like me when I was younger. She was smart, considerate and very willing. The prejudice against women back then were unbelievable and so she never made it to DC. He and Chris were practically married just before I came back. Chris was otherwise known as the div. He would state the obvious and asked the strangest of questions. However, he proved his worth in trying to be a good copper as he helped me give a psychological input into one of the cases."

Alex paused for breath and failed to notice Lexi's sudden interest.

"Ray carling was a good copper who was loyal and actually quite intelligent in his Neanderthal and misogynistic way. He did sometimes attempt to understand my psychology!" Alex and lexi shared a smile before Alex went into deep thought.

"What about DCI Hunt?" Lexi asked.

"DCI Gene Hunt was an overweight, over-the-hill, nicotine-stained, borderline alcoholic homophobe with a superiority complex and an unhealthy obsession with male bonding." Alex laughed at her own words that mirrored Sam's very own only about eighteen months ago. She wiped a tear delicately away from her eye and turned to face and alarmed looking Lexi.

"What's so funny?" She asked. To her, the description something out of a dinosaur book.

"Well, he may have been all those things but he was a...fiercely loyal, loving, caring and gentle man. He saved me, many, many times." Alex let her head droop. "And you know what? I think I fell for him. Hook, line and bloody sinker! We used to argue like cat and dog, but united there wasn't a thing we couldn't do. To be perfectly honest, it was a love-hate thing." Alex paused, waiting for Lexi to digest this information.

"Anyway, I fought constantly to try and return to the 'real world', but my attempts were in vain. On the day my parents were killed, I tried everything to keep them safe. I arrested them, kept them in cells and even ran over a car with a giant pink tank! Anyway, my methods were futile and they were killed right in front of my eyes. However, this time there was a difference. I knew the truth. My godfather had been having an affair with my mother and my father had found out. He plotted to blow my mother, himself and I up in a bomb attached to the cassette player. The tape that set it off was playing Davis Bowie's Ashes to Ashes. Prior to this, Evan had got Arthur Layton off his drugs charge to assist my father in making the bomb."

Lexi froze and gaped at Alex who carried on.

"Arthur Layton had been blackmailing Evan because of a tape. This tape, which I witnessed being destroyed by Gene Hunt, explained everything about why my father did what he did. Twenty-seven years later, Evan stopped paying and Arthur killed me. I know gene was real because he took my hand."

"Then you got back to the 'real world'?" Lexi enquired.

"No, Gene shot me by accident the following year. It was on accident. There was police corruption that we tried to stop and it ended in misunderstandings. Gene was aiming for another girl but she pushed me into his line of fire. I think I might have died in that world, leaving Gene to face the consequences."

Alex sniffed and rubbed her nose on her sleeve. She gave Lexi a lop-sided smile. "You must think I'm mad." She stated.

"No." Lexi replied. "I don't. I believe you completely. Tell me what you want to do and I'll help." Alex looked puzzled. "Well, I'm assuming that nobody else believes you and this is why you're upset. You obviously want to do something about it, so spill." She smiled. "I'm a psychologist too, you can't hide anything."

Alex pushed her limp hair behind her ear. "I'm going to find them. I'm going to break all the rules about personal files and I'm going to find out whether or not they exist. As you believe me, would you like to help?"

Lexi nodded desperately. "Yes, please, DI Drake."

"Lexi, do call me Alex." They smiled and shook hands.

"This is going to get confusing!" Lexi laughed, who was enjoying talking to Alex.

"Can I ask a question?" Alex said, now piecing together information. "Why _do_ you believe me?"

Lexi took a deep breath and replied shakily, "Because my mother and father went by the names of Sharon and Chris Skelton and I was named after one Alexandra Drake, shot by her DCI in November 1982."

**Authors Note: **_What d'ya think? I seem to be obsessed with cliff-hangers at the moment! Please Review as this story is proving quite difficult to write for some reason :) Thank you!_

Finding Answers xx


	3. Chapter Three

**Authors Note: **_I've decided to edit some of the things in this chapter, so you might need to read the last bit otherwise some of the plot is lost! I hope to update properly soon!_

_A massive thanks to Never-Clip-My-Wings for Beta-ing for me, you're a star!_

**Disclaimer: **_As usual...I don't own anything Ashes! :(_

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><p><em><strong>Because Time has a Loophole<br>Chapter Three-Make or Break Time**_

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><p>Alex sat on the wooden cloakroom bench with an emotionless mask covering her pale face. He pupils had dilated and her hazel eyes were glazed with shock. Her pink lips did nothing but twitch uncertainly and her arm snaked unconsciously around her stomach so her hand could gently rub the nonexistent wound where Gene had shot her.<p>

There was no doubt in her mind about what was real; Lexi's words were ringing in her ears combined with Evan story that morning. A strong aura of deep sadness and bereavement flooded her body and ran riot through her veins, accompanied by a sense of happiness at a prospect of meeting them all again after so much time. It was quite funny how it seemed almost years since she'd laid her eyes on CID and the shenanigans that they used to get up.

If everybody there was real then there was a large chance that she'd have heard about them before Arthur had shot her. Why hadn't she heard of them? They must have families and high ranks, surely?

Then something dawned on her string of questions: What if they were dead?

A small gasp escaped her lips and brought her tumbling back to reality.

"Alex?" Lexi enquired softly, looking a little concerned "Are you feeling okay? You've gone pale."

"Lexi..." Alex started, "Chris and Shaz, they're not..." she paused and wet her lips, "Dead, are they?"

It was the first time Alex had looked at Lexi properly; her hair was a blonde version of Shaz's from eighty-one and her facial were features were almost a direct spilt of both Chris and Shaz.

A frown worked its way into Lexi's concerned face as she focussed on Alex's question. She shook her head furitively.

"No. No, of course they're not. They live up north somewhere but I can never remember exactly where. But, no, they're very definitely alive." She placed a hand on Alex's shoulder. "Is that what's worrying you?"

Alex smiled warily, "Yeah. Yeah, it is."

"Well, my parents aren't so that's a start, right? We'll find the others as well. You'll see." Lexi nodded defiantly.

"But, how? We...I can't go snooping in personal files, that's breaking half of the regulations we've ever been given." Alex replied, depressed at the outlook of failing before they began.

"We'll find a way."

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><p>As Alex pulled up on her drive, she paused for a moment to think about the day. She and Lexi had been quiet when they came back into CID and agreed to tell nobody of their plans. Alex and Lexi were both aware of the serious consequences for looking at personal files and for doing some 'black ops' search missions.<p>

Feeling a sense of nagging for her to listen to some music, she slapped irritably at the radio button. Realising she was clutching at the steering wheel so hard her knuckles were turning white, Alex slumped her shoulders and relaxed against the comfortable seat.

Lexi had offered to give Alex a lift home and she accepted, on the condition that Lexi would let her drive.

It felt unbelievable strange to be in a car that didn't swerve to avoid other traffic, accurate at phenomenal speeds and do handbrake turns around sharp corners.

Overall, it felt weird not to be sat next to Gene Hunt while he was driving the almighty Quattro.

"Alex..." Lexi trailed off, unsure on how to start. They had been in the car a few mintues and she was starting to worry about Alex. "I think-" she was cut off by Alex holding her hand up very suddenly and leaning her right ear towards the radio speaker.

"Can you hear that?" Alex said excitedly, jabbing at the volume up button. "It's Phil Collins 'In the air tonight'!" she exclaimed, her voice having increased in pitch considerably,

Drawing her hands across her cheeks and swaying a soothing harmony, Lexi gave her a sideways look before she cottoned on and smiled.

"This...This was the song that played on the radio after I had discovered that Gene had joined the Masons and betrayed me. The next day he told me why he had joined and it was on the radio again. I love this song as much as Sam loved 'Life on Mars' after he awoke from his coma."

Lexi nodded slowly, thinking it best not to ask who Sam had been.

Alex shook her head and snapped out of her reverie. "Never mind. Thank you for the lift home, Lexi. I guess I'll see you tomorrow where we can start to plan what we're going to do."

"Yep, that's great. See you tomorrow."

Simultaneously, Lexi and Alex got out of the car and walked round to the front. Alex caught Lexi in a bear hug and whispered, "thank you" before walking to her front door.

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><p>When Alex got through the front door, Molly pounced on her and gave her a huge hug. "Hi, mum! Evan says we've got to have something to eat before we go to town. What do you want?"<p>

Rocking backwards and forewords on her heels, Alex grinned and called through to the kitchen, "Can you do me a bowl of soup please, Evan?"

Alex looked back at her daughter, sighing slightly, "So, Molls, what have you been at school?"

"Well, we've got a project to do, so me and Sally are hoping to go around each other's houses twice a week." She bit her lip thoughtfully, "Is that okay?"

"Molls, that is absolutely fine. Just let me know where you are, okay?"

Molly nodded and ran upstairs to grab her bag from her bag. She was over the moon that her mum was alive and well, but there seemed something else present that Molly couldn't quite place. She just seemed...disjoined - distant, even. But why?

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><p>Back downstairs, Alex kicked off her shoes and rubbed her heels. She had been wearing some small heels that day and her feet weren't used to it. She decided not to get changed, just to re-do her make-up into her usual eighties style.<p>

Evan wandered into the living room with her soup and set it down on the coffee table. "How was work?" he asked, sounding less than interested. Before Alex could answer, he cut in. "You didn't tell Molly and she wondered why you weren't here to take her into town at half past three like you promised."

"But, she was at school, Evan."

"You could have text her." Evan said, his eyes squinting at her slightly in disapproval.

"I...I forgot." She admitted, hanging her head. "Work was fine; I'm going back tomorrow." Grabbing the soup, she walked off into the kitchen, unable to stay there talking pointlessly when she had to make it up to her daughter.

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><p>"Yeah, and did you see him checking you out?" Molly called loudly to Alex who was juggling three large shopping bags and fumbling for the door key. "He was what? Twenty five years older than you?"<p>

Alex and Molly laughed at the antics that had happened in town. As they emerged through the door at exactly six forty five, Alex registered Molly's disapproving tone. Twenty five years older than you. Gene had been ten years older than her, at a rough guess. It had never stopped her adoring him. _Shut up, Alex. You didn't love him. He didn't love you._

Evan strolled through into the hall and took the heavy bags off Alex. He grunted with the effort.

"Bloody hell! What have you two been buying?"

"Just some stuff." Alex replied. "Make-up, shoes, clothes and books. Lots of books." she raised her eyebrows, emphasizing her last sentence.

Molly grinned and opened her bag. "I spent all my birthday money."

"Right, then Molls, let's get all this upstairs for sorting out and then we can watch a film if you want." Molly nodded and proceeded to run up the stairs.

Evan looked sternly at Alex but she held up her hand. "I know. I made a mistake and I'm going to put it right."

Evan breathed sighed and returned to the kitchen, leaving the bags on the floor by the stairs.

* * *

><p>Nodding at the desk sergeant (<em>That should be Viv<em>, she thought to herself), Alex strolled through the corridors of the Metropolitan Police Station and into CID, passing a quick note to Lexi about the locations of Personal files, just in case. Alex knew Lexi didn't have access, but with one nod from her, she be the distraction while Alex went and dug them out of the records room.

She sat at her desk and started on the case reports. She felt so rebellious; the old Alex Drake wouldn't have dared to break the rules, but the new Alex Drake had worked side-by-side with Gene Hunt for two years and had picked up several bad habits along the way.

Watching the constables' type furtively away on their keyboards without a worry for what was happening on the streets, Alex found herself in a familiar situation. Somewhere in the background noise, her DCI was calling for all arrest reports, warrant requests and evidence to be placed on the centre table so they could present them to the lawyers of the suspect.

Rolling her eyes at the complicity of it all, Alex reverted back to tapping the pen on the table. She had even come up with a name for it. Boredom syndrome. And she had every single bloody symptom.

The curiosity behind her motives for the files was actually quite unbelievable, especially for her. The psychologist in her knew what she'd prescribe as a treatment or therapy, but what happens if you want what you can't have?

Alex pondered on this for a while.

_Twenty-five years older than you._

She had the answer.

Glancing sideways at Lexi who was ambling causally towards the printer, Alex nodded her head and mouthed signalling words:

'Let's do this.'

* * *

><p>Alex knew she had mere minutes to check through the personal files before one of the PC's would come in to enquire what she was doing. Alex also knew that without a slip from her DCI and the Case Number, she would have to answer awkward questions. <em>Great,<em> she thought, _gone are the days that Gene and I used to do things after hours and use our rank to get things we needed. Never mind, I'm sure that he'll be okay…won't he?_

Scanning through the hundreds of archive files, she finally found them. All except Gene.

Alex screwed up her eyes and brushed her hands over face. Maybe she shouldn't have come looking for them. She dived back out and went to the stationary cupboard to photocopy them.

Lexi wondered in to find her muttering to herself about dying or suicide.

"Ma'am? What's wrong?"

Alex turned and sighed. "I can't find Gene's folder." Lexi nodded and no further explanation was needed.

* * *

><p>"Evan!" Alex bellowed, "Just shut up and listen to me for two minutes!" Evan sat stiffly on the kitchen chair and stared at his God-Daughter. "I'm going to take a trip to Newcastle with a friend from work. I shouldn't be gone more than two days. Work has given me the time off to follow up my enquiries. There's nothing you can do about."<p>

Evan looked at her with a flicker of an angry expression "Please Alex. Think about this, for Molly's sake."

"Don't bring her into this. I'm doing it so I can lay my ghosts to rest. I'll see you Monday, Evan."

And with that, Alex Drake picked up her case and headed out towards Lexi's car.

What she didn't see was little Molly Drake clutching more photocopies of the personal files, standing in the bedroom window.

Watching. Always watching.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note: <strong>_Thank you for reading...please leave me a review :)_

__20/10/12 - There's also a poll on my profile :) could you please check it out? xx thanks!__

Finding Answers xx


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